Dina at 20 weeks -- 02/11/11

Dina @ 20 weeks - 02/11/11

Dina at 12 weeks -- 12/26/10



Dina @ 12 weeks - 12/26/10



Telling the Parents…Napkins and Cake…

As a couple, finding out you really are pregnant truly is an amazing moment.  The next best thing (at least up to this point) is getting to share that information with others!

Telling one’s parents you are expecting, especially if you are a Daughter or an Only Child, makes for a pretty special occasion.  And with Dina and me, as most of you know, why do anything in an “ordinary” fashion?

The timing of telling our parents actually worked out very well.  We wanted to wait until we were far enough along that we felt fairly confident things were OK.  We obviously wanted to do it ‘together’, and we wanted it to be a memorable event.   Dina went home to Kentucky in November, but I was not able to join her, so that was out.  She wasn’t showing too much at that point and was able to stay in stealth mode.   Since her parents are fans of the River City Men’s Chorus and have only missed one concert series since I started singing with them 5 years ago, they had already planned to be in Little Rock for the Holiday concert.  So, we decided that weekend would be the perfect time!

We really spent some time trying to figure out just how we wanted to ‘surprise’ them.  It is not uncommon for my parents and her parents to have dinner together while they are here, we decided we would cook and just have everyone at our house that Saturday night.  Initially, Dina came up with the idea to take ‘onesies’ (the little baby outfits) and roll them up and put them in napkins holders/napkin rings and just have them on the table.  She decided fairly quickly that idea was just too easy and there had to be something else.  She kept thinking (“scheming” is probably a better term) and came up with the idea of using cloth napkins and t-shirt paint to write out the sentence, one word on each napkin, “Guess…what…we…are…having…?”  She took each napkin, folded it so that none of the writing showed, and put them in festive napkin holders.

Festive Christmas Table Decor

The weekend of the visit arrived and Dina’s Mom, Dad and Grandmother, Minnie, made it in without issue.  My parents (Mom, Step-mom Dianne, and Dad) were also here.   Dinner prep went very well (pot roast in the crock pot, with potatoes, carrots, and green beans…yum!).  The food was served, everyone sat down at the table with their plates, a blessing was offered, and the napkins were placed randomly.

No one really took notice of the napkins when taking them out of the rings…you did read earlier that Dina had cooked pot roast…YUM…no wonder they were headed straight for the food.  Dina sort of cleared her throat and said “you might want to look at your napkins”.  As it turns out, my Mom got “Guess” (and had just assumed it was a brand name and thought nothing of it), Dina’s Dad got “are” and was a bit confused, my Dad got the “?”.  However, her Mom got “having” and that was all it took for her! 

Guess What We Are Having ?

Jean (Dina’s Mom) looked up at Dina and said “Are you kidding me?!?  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?”  She jumped up, grabed Dina and a bear hug and a bit of boo-hooing began.  The rest of the folks around the table were looking at them and still in a bit of a confused state.  Her Dad looked up and said “What?”  Dina and I both said “you might want to look at your napkins a little bit closer.”  After looking at the napkins, the rest of the table figured it out and were VERY excited.  A few tears crept out and over all it was a very excited mood.

Dina and I walked into the kitchen to fix our plates and she leaned over, and with an evil grin and in a very sinister voice said “Phase 1, complete!”  (Wow… that was a bit of a scary moment, I’m not sure I had really ever seen that side of her before!)

As the news of us expecting began to settle in over dinner and the questions and comments flowed freely, we still had “Phase 2”.  As some of us were finishing the main course, Dina offered that “we do have a ‘celebratory strawberry cake’ for dessert.   It has pink and blue icing on it, so we have had it hidden and didn’t want to give away the surprise.”  Everyone had pretty much finished eating, so I decided to go get the cake. 

Again, from Dina’s creative, yet slightly devious side, she had ordered a cake with the number “3” in icing on the top.

That would be a "3"

As I walked back in with the cake, her Mom was standing near the doorway to the kitchen, and was the first to really see the top of the cake.  She took one look, turned to Dina and very excitedly said “Seriously?!?!?  SERIOUSLY?!?!?”  She reached over to Dina with another big embrace and a few more tears.  Once again, the rest of the folks around the table look at the cake and say “What?”  I tried to show them the cake a little better (in their defense, it probably was a little difficult to tell what the figure was).  Jean helped them by saying (through the tears) it’s a “three”, and Dina held up 3 fingers to help them out also.   Dina and I both grinned and said “Triplets”.  With a rather shocked look, Dianne (my step-mother) said “Triplets??  Triplets??”  We both nodded and said yep, there’s three.  Dina reached around behind her and picked up strip of ultrasound photos (which was about 3 feet long) and said “And I’ve got the proof!”

Needless to say, it was quite a world rocking experience for all of our parents, and one they won’t likely forget any time soon!

The only real drawback to telling them was that we still had her brother and some other family in Kentucky who we wanted to tell face-to-face.  This was the type of news you just didn’t share over the phone, and they were going to have to keep it a secret!

… and the Circle continues to grow.

December is here, and so are her parents…

We had managed to get through November and Thanksgiving with my family and through the end of Football /tailgating season without arousing too many suspicions.  The RCMC concert weekend was approaching, and Dina parents were due to be at the house late Friday night (it’s typically a 6-hour drive).  Her parents and her grandmother made it in around Midnight, and were pretty worn out.

One of the side effects of being pregnant, and certainly so with carrying triplets, is the amount of energy they consume and consequently the amount of food needed to sustain them! 

*(Side note:  One fantastic piece of advice Dina received early on was to never get to the point of being hungry, and to always stay in front of it to keep from getting sick.  This seems to have worked so far.  Although she had some minor bouts with nausea, she never has been sick.)

Saturday morning’s routine for the past 3 or 4 years on these concert weekends has been pretty much the same.  I get up and head to rehearsal around 8:30.  The rest of the folks get up and around whenever, and they usually have a fairly large breakfast (I only know this from the scraps and leftovers). 

On this particular morning, as had become her bladder’s custom, Dina was up fairly early, and after a priority stop at the restroom, her stomach was now awake and making its level of hunger known.  Keeping with her now normal routine, Dina disappeared into the kitchen to grab a quick bite to eat.  She usually sits in the recliner (and enjoys her latest viewing idiosyncrasy - catching a rerun of Matlock or Perry Mason) and eats her first little meal of the day.  However today, about 2 minutes later, she appears back in the bedroom with her bowl of cereal and spoon in hand with a sheepish look.  She climbs in the bed with her snack and I just sort of look at her with an inquisitive stare.

She responded that no one was up yet and if her mother heard her stirring around, she would get up, and she would see Dina eating a snack.   Then, later when they actually cooked the big breakfast, Dina would be eating again.  She was quite certain her mother would get suspicious and know something was up. 

I don’t think I’ve ever heard of clandestine breakfast in bed as a side effect of pregnancy!

T-minus 12 hours and counting…

It’s not quite December yet…

Although this adventure really began around the first of October, you do have some time in which you can hide this sort of thing, but that only lasts for so long!

Since we were still scheming to tell our parents when they were all together in December, and those were the first ones we wanted to really ‘tell’, we still had a little bit of time to keep her ‘only slightly’ growing belly camouflaged.  The second weekend of November, Dina needed to make a trip to Kentucky to visit her family.

She carefully picked out what she would wear to help try and hide her little baby bump and actually was able to keep things hidden with no one suspecting anything.

One funny moment happened when Dina and her mother were on the way to a Pampered Chef party, and her mother made one of the conversation openers that really make you stop and wonder.  Jean said “There is something I want talk to you about before we get to the party.”  Dina immediately thought ‘OK, something has happened and there’s something or someone that you can’t say or don’t want to mention.’  Her mother went on to say that Dina and I had really been in her mind lately.  She said one of her customers, who was older than Dina and had been told all of her life she would not be able to have children, was pregnant.  She told Dina to not give up hope and to just put it in God’s hands and it would work out.  Dina really had to put on her poker face as she thought to herself… “I’m gonna ROCK your world in about three weeks Mom!”

She was able to contain herself and told her Mom that we were not giving up and that things would work out!

And boy howdy… did we ever rock her world in December!

Sharing the news… timing is everything

Truly one of the early joys and thrills of being pregnant is getting to share that little piece of information with your friends and family.  That fun is magnified almost exponentially when you get the added bonus and shock of telling them it is triplets!  What makes that even more enjoyable is coming up with ‘unique’ ways to share that information with different people.  ‘Seeing’ the reaction really is priceless!

As with most everything in this world, there is a certain hierarchy and order in which you want to share this type of information.  Obviously one’s parents would be very high, if not at the top, of the list.  And, this is not the type of information you want to share over the phone, ‘cause it’s just not the same.

When we started trying to figure out when we were going to be able to tell our parents, it seemed like it was going to work out perfectly that Dina’s parents would be in Little Rock the first weekend in December for the River City Men’s Chorus concert.  That’s when the REAL scheming began!  And as Col. John "Hannibal" Smith (the A-Team) says, “I love it when a plan comes together!”

Sharing the news…with me

As the mentioned in the previous post (Words you don’t want to hear), I really should not have missed the first appointment at 6 weeks.

While Dina was at the doctor’s office, I went about my work day as usual.  As 11:00 rolled around, my stomach (and co-worker) determined it was lunchtime.  As we drove to a lunch spot, I received a text from Dina saying that the doctor was running late, and she was still waiting.  After digging out my phone from under my jacket and seatbelt, it was just easier to sit it down in the console.  For those that know me, my phone is like an appendage, and I very seldom ever am without it.  But my stomach’s priority became my focus and I left my phone in the console as we went in for lunch.

*(Side note – ever make one of those statements that comes back to haunt you?!?  I know it’s a crazy notion, but I sometimes get frustrated with Dina when she doesn’t have her phone or when she ignores it, and I need to get in touch with her.  Yeah, well… you get the idea where this is headed!)

My co-worker and I had an uneventful lunch, and returned to the truck.  As I sat down, I noticed I left my phone in the console (oops!!!).  I had 1 missed call, 1 text message, and it started ringing while I was looking at it.

In a somewhat exasperated voice Dina says “WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?”  I respond with “Sorry, I left my phone in the truck after your text earlier.”  Again, I get “Where are you?!?”  Sensing the urgency in her voice, I said “At lunch, with Ben, at Jason’s.  Are you OK?!?”  She said “Yes, I’ll be right there!”  Having already started the truck and pulling out of the parking space, I told her “Hold on, we’re on the way back to the office.”  “OK” she says, “I’ll meet you there in the parking lot.”

At this point I’m thinking to myself she said she was OK, so that’s good, but this could be a rather ‘interesting’ discussion.  Ben, on the other hand, had heard only one side of the conversation and offered something along the line of “I don’t know what you did, but that didn’t sound good!”  I sort of laughed and sloughed it off, and we went back to the office.

Just as she said, Dina was waiting in the parking lot.  I sat down in the passenger seat and asked her what was up, and was she OK.  She gave me a brief overview of the doctor’s visit, then she grins and confirms that we are in fact pregnant!  I don’t really think that was too much of a shock, since we had already done the EPT with the “magic wand”, but still it was a pretty amazing thing to know that we were pregnant.

Then, she pulls out a folded up piece of paper, and proceeds to show me an ultrasound picture of a tiny lima bean looking thing.  She smiles and looks at me, watching to see if there is any response, and I ‘think’ I might have nodded slightly.  She smiles a little bigger, raises her eyebrows and unfolds another page, and says “that’s one…and this is two,” then unfolds ANOTHER page and says “and this is THREE!!!”

So there she sits, holding 2 feet worth of accordion-folded ultrasound photos.  And there I sit, with a pair of wrap around sunglasses on, so dark she could not even see my eyes.  I’m not really sure what was running through my mind, aside from a bit of shock settling in, and I didn’t really move or say anything.  (I think I knew this was a possibility, but never really gave it that much thought).  Dina sat there for a few more seconds, patiently and expectantly waiting for a reply or a response of any sort.  I don’t know how long she waited on me to process the information, but finally she couldn’t stand it any longer.  She reached over with one hand a carefully raised my sun glasses to uncover my eyes -- 1) to see if I was still conscious, 2) trying to see if I was even coherent at this point, and 3) to see if she could see any type of reaction in my eyes!  At some point I do think I at least blinked and she asked me “are you OK?”  That sort of brought me back to reality… or at least to whatever this new “reality” is, on which we were about to embark!!

Words you don't really want to hear... (from your OB/GYN, while you have your feet in stirrups and an ultrasound wand in your hoo ha

Following the actual “procedure” and then the “magic wand of wonder”, the next big step was the first visit back to the doctor.  While we discussed whether both of us needed to go, we decided they were probably just going to do a blood test to confirm the magic wand and that would be about it.  Au contraire, mon frère...this would be the first appearance and discovery of the trips!  (*Note to the guys, do NOT miss ANY appointments, EVER.  Go to all of them!) 

Unbeknownst to us, Dina would have her first ultrasound on this visit.  And for those of us who are a) not of the female gender and b) unfamiliar with this whole process, this was an “internal” type of ultrasound, where the doctor uses a wand and goes inside, to get an up-close and personal view.  The proctologist just really doesn’t seem that bad after learning about this procedure.

If you’ve never been in one of these rooms, they aren’t exactly huge, open spaces.  It’s rather cozy to have that much equipment in there, and a nurse and a doctor.  So out go the lights, she’s in the stirrups, and the doctor begins his examination.  After several minutes (that seemed like hours), the doctor is poking and prodding and taking ‘snap shots’ of her uterus.  The nurse very quietly and (attempting to be discrete) leans over to the doctor and says the infamous words you really do not want to hear while you have your feet up in stirrups and an ultrasound wand in your hoo ha, “Does she know?”  (WHAT?!?!?  Are you kidding me?!?!?) 

At this point… Dina just about comes up off the table, stares at the doctor, and in a ‘rather’ concerned voice says…”I’m right here, do I know WHAT?!?”

Dr. Moutos very reservedly and calmly says “Everything is fine, just relax.  Let me take a couple more pictures and I’ll show you the monitor.”  I’m not real sure she bought it or her blood pressure has anywhere close to normal at this point, but in just a few more minutes, he removed the wand and turned the monitor around.  He proceeds to point out one small outlined oval with something that resembles a lima bean inside it and says “here’s one”.  He then points to another spot on the screen and says “here’s two more!”, to which she responded, “two more as in 1 and 1 is two, or two more as in THREE?!?”  Dr. Moutos said it is three total.

While I wasn’t there, I can vividly imagine the sheer look of disbelief, followed by a smile, accompanied with a chuckle/laugh, which I’ve seen and heard numerous times since then.

Dr. Moutos explained that faced with all the issues we were, and the fact she was on the lowest dose of Clomid, she was in the less than 1% category for conceiving multiples.  Dina responded with a laugh, “it’s all my mother’s fault!”

For years, Dina and her mother (Jean) have had a long running joke when asked about having a baby.  Dina’s response had been…”well, maybe one, I don’t know.”  And just to harass her, Jean would respond with “well in that case, I’ll just have to pray for twins!”  (Cue the closing music clip of Alanis Morissette’s “Ironic”,  “And isn't it ironic...don't you think!”)

The Circle grows…

You know how some news is too good to keep secret and that feeling that if you don’t tell someone you’re just going to burst!  Well… Dina was almost busting at the seams (no pun or foreshadowing intended) to tell someone!

In my mind, I sort of pictured Dina and I as being together in the proverbial ‘Circle of Trust’ (Jack Byrnes, “Meet the Parents).  As we shared the information with another person or group, our little circle would grow.  I sort of figured, the first real additions to the circle would be our parents. 

However, there were a few additions along the way…

Following ‘The Shot episode’, and the actual procedure, there were some meds which Dina had been instructed to take.  Unfortunately, while at the doctor’s office, we didn’t think to ask if she should continue taking that med if she actually became pregnant.  Being the weekend, we were not able to talk to the nurse in the doctor’s office and Dina was concerned.  We have some very good friends who have been travelling this same road, and she is a nurse.  So Dina picked up the phone and gave her a call.  The usual pleasantries were exchanged and then Dina sort of snuck in a question about the med she was taking, and ‘if she happened to get pregnant, would she need to stop taking the meds’.  Without giving it a second thought, our friend responded, it would be fine to keep taking the medication.  It should not pose any issues and… “WAIT A MINUTE!!! Are you not telling me what you’re not telling me?!?!?!”

… the Circle on Dina’s side grows by one!

I can only imagine the totality of thoughts, feelings, and emotions that course through a pregnant women’s body accompanied and ushered by the onslaught of hormones.  After years of trying, and finally actually getting pregnant, there were so many questions she wanted to ask and things she wanted to know, but there was no one to talk with when you have just found out (and ‘the Circle’ is still pretty small).  Again, sometimes you just have to share.  Since one of our friends was already somewhat in the loop from ‘the Shot Episode’, and Dina really needed to be able to talk about it, she told our friends and voila.

… the Circle grows by two!

As we march on toward telling the folks in December, there were a few others along the way as our Circle continued to grow.

Sometimes you just have to wait… especially on the Magic Wand

There are a lot of things in life you end up following the old adage of “hurry up and wait”, and Tom Petty crooned “waiting is the hardest part”.  It’s really not that different waiting on the Magic Wand.  (I’m stealing the phrase “Magic Wand” from Harlan Cohen’s Dad’s Pregnant too!  It is a really good book for both Moms and Dads.)

The Magic Wand is all powerful, holds the answers to one of life’s true mysteries, and once it’s waved, a guy’s power, place and fate in the world is sealed!  You really have to read the excerpt from the book to gain a full appreciation for that.

Back to waiting… following the procedure, all you can do is wait.  Will we know in 7 days, should we wait for 10, 2 weeks is too long we can’t stand it. 

Following the procedure Dina had to travel with work, and was going to be out of town on day 7.  She was able to hold off and made it back home before she was going to do the deed and pee on the stick.

It wasn’t quite like waking up as a child on Christmas morning and having that level of excitement and anticipation, but there certainly was an air of eagerness when she woke up (it has to be a morning thing).  And just HOW LONG can three minutes turn into?!?!?!?

Regardless of the anticipation and anxiety, seeing that test positive after this long was one of those crazy, “Wow” moments!  You want to jump and shout, but you also don’t want to jinx it, and for it not to be true.

And as it turns out, it truly is magic!

Voila… the Magic Wand!



The Magic Wand



10-10-10

There are some things over which you just don’t have any control.  When timing is of the utmost importance, and you’re on nature’s time clock, you sort of have to do what you have to do when nature says it’s time.  Setting the process in motion was ‘the Shot episode’, which meant 36 hours later (Sunday morning) we would have the IUI procedure.  There are any number of amusing and equally embarrassing stories I could probably share about ‘the process’ but I’d like to keep this a primarily ‘G’ rated blog.

I would like to acknowledge that I had never thought about the fact that due to the nature of 'timing' happening 7 days per week, the doctor's office staff would also have to work 7 days a week.  I greatly appreciate the dedication of their staff and the fact that they provide their services every day of the week.

There are two side notes on this whole adventure I will share.

Sitting in the waiting room waiting to go in for the IUI procedure, my cell phone rang.  I received a call from my Mom and Aunt while they were sitting in the airport in Atlanta with my Great Aunt on their way to take a Caribbean Cruise.  There were a couple of things she somewhat urgently needed for me to do for her in Little Rock.  Assuming I was at church (which at 9:15 on a Sunday morning was a fairly safe bet), she asked if I could go to her condo and take care of a couple of things.  Her condo is just a short jog from the Church.  Sharing that I was not at Church and was sitting in a waiting room was really not an option, but I did tell her I would take care of it.  Eventually, I did.  Blatantly lying to your parents, even as an adult with a very good reason, is not a lot of fun.  But, it was rather humorous for Dina and me to share while we were waiting.  It may have just been the nervous energy.

The down side to the whole IUI procedure is the somewhat ‘impersonal’ nature of it.  Calling it the turkey baster method probably doesn’t help that whole image either.  As I stood there holding her hand, one of the things that kept running through my mind was Bill Cosby’s comedy routine on “Natural Child Birth” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mvkz9Rqzcs0).  He quotes Carol Burnett describing and comparing labor pains and child birth to “pulling your lower lip over your head!” and the ensuing description as his wife announces to the entire delivery room “this is HIS FAULT, he did this to me!”  And my thoughts were, when that happens, at that exact moment, I’d have the out of saying “but all I did was hold your hand!”

I know, a perfectly wonderful moment spoiled by my mind wondering to a comedy bit!  Go figure!

Obviously, things worked out very well.

It’s All about Timing…The Shot Episode…

One of the prerequisites to having the IUI procedure was giving Dina an injection of hCG precisely 36 to 40 hours before ovulation.  After a couple of tests at the doctor’s office they told us we would need to give her an injection Friday night at 8:00.  She got the kit, which was basically a prefilled syringe with a fairly small needle.   This all seems innocuous enough, until you factor in the ‘minor’ problem that neither Dina nor I do very well with needles!

She was a pretty nervous about the fact we would have to administer an injection in her abdomen.  But what was more worrisome, was the fact that she knew she would not be able to give it to herself, which left me as the likely candidate to have to actually give her the shot! 

She gave me a call with the news that we would have to perform an injection in her abdomen, and asked if I would be able to do that.  My response, as truthful as I could make it, was “we’ll figure it out.”  Obviously, that really wasn’t the reassuring response and confidence instilling words she wanted to hear.  She promptly called one of our very dear friends and put her on ‘alert’ that she might have to help.

When I got home, Dina asked me again if I was going to be able to do this, which I said once again that “we would figure it out. “  As we discussed it, she warned that we were running out of time to make other arrangements.  So I tried to reassure her that I would be able to give her a shot.

After dinner as 8:00 approached, she began to get a bit nervous, which pretty much was a reflection of my own emotions I’m sure.  She gave me the kit and I read through the instructions.  And, being the internet geek that I am, I even went to the doctor’s website, where they had a pretty good instructional video!  Go figure!

It was 8:00 and it was time!  Knowing ‘my’ history with needles, I figured having her lying down would be a much better option if she did happen to get light-headed or actually pass out (or if “I” decided to do either of those!).  She sat down on the couch, trying one way then another, and then finally settling in with her legs stretched out across my lap and her leaning back toward the other end of the couch.  Her nervousness really beginning to show, she raised her shirt to expose her belly button…”the width of two fingers spaced to the side, and at a 45 degree angle… you’re sure you can do this…” she says.  And then the giggles set in.  There is obviously no way in the world I (or anyone else for that matter) was going to be able to give her this shot with her laughing and her tummy shaking.

I gave her a minute to pull it together and tried to pick a spot, remembering the instruction and the video and her ‘coaching’.  About the time I got myself psyched up to actually poke her with the needle and started to approach her abdomen, she covers the spot with her hands and stops me.   “Are you sure you can do this?” she worriedly asked me again.

“It will be fine, just a stick and a sting.  No big deal.” I respond.  By this time I’ve “obviously” instilled a great deal of confidence and broken right through that barrier of nervousness she had built up.  I tried to approach her with the syringe again, and again she put one hand over her abdomen and one had over her face saying “wait a minute!”

I again tried to reassure her it would be fine, “it’s a small needle, no big deal; it will be over like that.”  Looking over her hand and still blocking her tummy, she responded, in a rather exasperated voice, “You are NOT A TRAINED MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, you don’t know that!!”

After a brief reprieve while we both laughed at her last ditch effort to avoid the shot, she settled down, we both took deep breaths and I proceeded to administer the shot.  There was no great flash of pain, no blood, no wailing and gnashing of teeth, no passing out, and both parties survived the shot episode!

First shot of the Triplets at 8 weeks - 11/23/10

This was the first shot (and basically the last) where we had

ALL three of them in one frame. 

In a later ultrasound session, they were identified as follows:

Baby A on the right side

Baby B on the left side (that's the small oval on the lower left)

Baby C in the middle (on the top in later shots)

Taken on 11/23/10